FEMBOTS VS. THE SONIC SPIDER
Females and me. I get
along fine if they're just friends. Relationships, however...they always
seem to decay into nothingness before my very ocular devices. In hindsight,
I've been able to discern a pattern within all my (failed) romantic relationships
so far. There are eight distinct stages.
-
everything fine. I think this is "the one" cause
it starts out so well
-
I get quiet & uncommunicative
-
female assumes something is wrong, gets annoyed
-
female avoids me, no communication causes problems
to blow out of proportion for both parties
-
I notice a growing disintigration, and go straight
into denial. female doesn't know what to do, indecisive on action, continues
avoidance
-
problems overtake all, too late to resolve satisfactorily,
female backs out, "breakup, friends" speech
-
I avoid female, 2-4 week depression
-
I'm back to (ab)normal, except uneasy & uncomfortable
around female
.
Now, with this knowledge,
if by freak occurance I actually get into another relationship, I hope
to break out of this cycle I've been trapped in for 2 years.
disclaimer: this is a tongue-in-cheek
look at the history of my romantic life. it is not to be taken LITERALLY!
.
.
