didnt sleep
wasnt tired
milled around the house, watching old MST3K tapes
bought parliaments around 7am
preparing for the bowling alley thing tonight
mom wakes up at 9:30
sends me to buy the two sunday papers
i watch more mst3k
i go cash in my loose change at the Coinstar machine so i can get gas
$12 voucher, i buy more parliaments
drop off some overdue library books (an HTML book and the communist manifesto)
got gas
now heres where the day starts sucking
guy notices my front right tire is low
i noticed last night it was a little low, so i say "i know"
turns out i have a fucking flat
now this wouldnt be a big deal, except...
I HAVE NO FUCKING MONEY
because fucking work wont give me fucking hours because while i had pink eye for a month i couldnt work, and that was during december, where 70% of Toys R Us' yearly sales takes place.
and now i work saturdays 5 till closing (we close at 9:30, get out at least an hour after that)
for $5.60 an hour
and its the slow time of the year
so they couldnt give me hours, even if they fucking wanted to
anyway, i drive home with a flat tire
it starts raining
i park my car in the driveway and proceed to break out the spare
only i discover one thing
the previous owner took the jack out
so i wait for my mom to get home so i can use the jack in her car
changing the tire proceeds smoothly
i put the spare on, removed the jack...
the spare is at 1/4 the pressure it should be
so i try to go to sleep
after putting my now-useless car in the garage
cause i hadnt slept yet
just as im about to trancend unconsciousness,
phone rings
its one of the collection agencies
i tell them ill send the check this weekend (yeah right ill have $70+ by then)
go back to sleep
just as im about to transcend unconsciousness,
phone rings
my brother looking for domino's pizza coupons
i drag my drowsy ass outta bed
go get his damn coupons
tell him the expired last month
tell him about the tire
work out a plan
i gave up on sleeping
called tom, he's sick with the flu
no ride to the alley
i call todd's cell phone
no answer
i decide to wait until around 7 before i call back
but i fell asleep on the couch watching more mst3k, i dont know what time
woke up at 8pm. we're s'posed to go bowling
i watched simpsons
and called todd
said someone would pick me up
after the first game
9pm
beth calls me
theyre done bowling
and no one is going to dennys
y'know
normally, i try to be as calm and rational as possible
because when i lose my temper, things get ugly
but im having a hard time
right now
controlling it
lets see....
yesterday i was happy cause things looked as if they were working out
what happened today?
lost my mobility and got shafted by fate
im not a religious man, im agnostic
i need a higher power to prove its existence to me
but...
why
are
you
doing
this
to
me
God
!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
you fucking non-existent asshole
when the fuck does something actually go right in my life?
well id better go smoke all those cigarettes i bought, its going to be a long, lonely night
9:23pm, 1/5/97