maddening nights of alcoholic excess poetry written in a severely drunken state of mind 3/14-3/17/1998 the cigarette butt is mashed into the glass ashtray joining its fallen brethren skeletal cigarettes an elephant graveyard of filters telling drunk stories and reading drunk poetry to drunk people at the drunk bar you like my words? you're buying me a shot? all right ever increasing maddening nights of alcoholic excess bloodshot eyes in the morning electric razor burn hurt ready for another night of boozing and schmoozing im leaving soon new york or bust return to the fatherland back to my roots with my anti-iowan feelings and alcoholic education i cannot wait . letter to stew(ness) about my vision id better write this down lest i forget for i am soon to fall asleep again- these are the side effects of too much of the grainy alcohol excesses of boredom middle america- i had a vision last night of the alcohol goddess- from whose teat i wean my noxious liquid chemicals to forget the pain of years- i saw her in white holy blinding flashy radiance she said, "Put down that beer, my loyal disciple, and enter the arms of Morpheus." so i agreed and my cat- beautiful female timothy- agreed; without seeing the white blinding white holy bright eye-searing glowing protocultury radiance of my heavenly alcohol goddess with god-spun gold hair and white clingy dress, that i should retire so i sleep- and enter the realm in which i feel most comfortable, that dimension among all places i see and breath and shit and exist in that makes me feel all right and forget all the women who delight in shattering my heart and soul- i sleep snore snore snore . spare me a few moments as i tell more of my vision alcohol goddess, she opened a door from her heaven-nest bright blinding holy white aura i try to shut my eyes but this doorway was opened in my mind so it wasn't really real